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  • Writer's pictureDarcie Litwicki

A View through Kindness

"Find your balance through mindfulness, deep listening in your heart and in the hearts of others, connect authentically. ~Wisdom of Buttercup~

Horses show up authentically, just as they are. They are not trying to fit in by wearing the latest styles or saying the right things. Horses are present, and their ever rotating ears are always listening to what's around them. They connect to their herd with their full heart and communicate exactly what they feel in each and every moment. We can learn a lot from them if we are open to listening.

Connection is something that people want and need in their lives. When we take time to be still, we realize that the connections we really crave are ones that are authentic. The ones where we can show up just as we are and still feel accepted and valued. To offer a way to get to more authentic connection, I have three steps I'd like to share here.

  1. IT BEGINS WITH YOU: Starting with yourself, do some deep listening to that inner-voice. Lean into that voice with curiosity and ask questions to figure out what it is that you really want in your connection to yourself. What feelings are coming up for you and why are you having them? Are you engaging in any behaviors that make you feel badly? Why? Offer yourself some kindness around this work as you create a list of what you want to change and identify things you want to leave as is. Then make a plan for the things you want to change. Will you journal, mediate, read a book on the topic, just think, or seek help? Finally, make some action steps that you will commit to doing and make do them.

  2. MOVE BEYOND YOURSELF: Once you have your connection to yourself moving in a good direction, begin to reach out beyond yourself to others that you wish to connect to. Listen deeply to what they have to share and ask curious but kind questions to help you understand and also show them that you are interested in learning more about them from a place of compassion. Do their values align with yours? Can you find a place of common ground? Even if you don't agree with them, can you at least understand where they are coming from, given their life schema? Decide which people you wish to build deeper connections with now that you are getting to know them and practice communicating with kindness, compassion, and empathy that flows both ways.

  3. DISCOVER LARGER CONNECTIONS: Reach out beyond your circle of family and friends to your larger community. Learn what groups and various organizations do for your community and what values they uphold in their work. Do their values resonate with yours? Think about how your gifts and talents fit within those various groups or organizations and how you feel about the idea of working with them as a volunteer, or maybe even an employee. You may even decide to begin your own group that has a mission created by you and based on what is truly important to you. Offer kindness and be open in your communication so that you find a place where you "belong" instead of a place to "fit-in."

Connecting in a real way with others can be very fulfilling and can help provide more balance in your life. The idea of balance, creates an image for me of a horse that is working in collection. The horse's body is rounded, they are centered and balanced so that they are ready to go in any direction. I like to ask my horse to begin preparing for collection from a point of stillness first. From this point of stillness, they are present (mindful), attuned (listening), and connected to themselves and to me. Then when we are ready, we go together!

Darcie Litwicki is a Certified Professional Life Coach that combines solid coaching skills and working with horses to create a dynamic and transformative coaching process for people to reach their personal and professional goals. She believes her clients are the experts in their own lives and that we all have the ability to reach our highest potential but sometimes we need support to get there.

Have you scheduled your free 60-minute coaching session to determine if this is a good fit for you in your life? Contact Darcie to get scheduled. You can schedule Equine Assisted Coaching In-Person Sessions at Silver Heart Ranch or sessions online (Zoom), or by phone. Darcie also offers a variety of group coaching options, workshops, and online classes. Contact her to learn more! 520-370-8093;

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